I wonder if it’s possible to be a self-enabler? If so, that’s me. I could talk myself into, and out of, any problem or want I could have. Want a Snicker bar or a pint of Ben and Jerry’s? Okay, no problem, it’s just one little sweet treat. Don’t want to clean the house? I can always do it tomorrow. Ha. I’m the worst. I self soothe, I convince myself it’s okay, I promise myself tomorrow will be different. Tomorrow is never different. I’ve always been like this.
It occurred to me earlier, though, that my husband is, too. He’s an enabler. If I want a candy bar or a burger, all I have to do is say so and he’s more than happy to get me two. If I want something, anything, he’s there to give it to me. I used to smoke. Not much, but I did, and then I quit. Cold turkey, I just stopped doing it because I didn’t want to anymore. Still, every time we go to the tobacco store here in town, he asks me if I want anything. I know it’s at least partially his desire to see me happy. If he could get me something, anything, no matter how small, he will. It’s always been like that with us, but to some degree it’s unhealthy, too.
If I enable my naughtier habits, like chocolate, and so does he, who’s left to say that it might not be a great idea? The answer, of course, is no one. The problem is, he can’t say no, or tell me not to, out of fear that it might be taken wrong. When I was much, much lighter than I am now, my ex told me that I needed to see a doctor or get counseling for my weight. That really hurt. Yes, I was a little overweight, but not so severely that he should say something so mean. It wasn’t a good approach, he called me fat without coming out and saying, “You’re fat.” He was mean, Hubby’s not. He can’t do that, he loves me the way I am, and it keeps him from helping me resist the urge to have what I want, when I want it.
He loves me the way I am. God, all this talk about Snickers and I want one. Someone save me from myself.
*smacks your hand*
NO Snickers for joo!!!
Better? ;P
Lol, hey I’m going to the store right now to get a snickers, I’m a self enabler as well, want me to pick you up one? lol. Seriously it’s good you have someone who loves you the way you are.
Kristine, I knew I could count on you!!
Bob, if you’re going that way already, you may as well pick one up for me too!
Seriously though, you’re right, it is really nice to have someone who loves me the way I am! I have a fantastic husband!
Well, I guess I’m an enabler to, and I do EACTLY the same thing for my wife. Yes it’s about love however, I’m sure not wanting to get into trouble anymore is also a factor LOL at least it is for me.
Take care Mae …. remember ONE snickers bar…. too much of a good thing isn’t good at all.
~JD
I love Snickers. But I’ve actually done extraordinarily well since I started m personal boycott of chocolate/cacao products from the ivory coast and haven’t touched any chocolate that wasn’t fair trade/slave trade free. Woooo me!
That’s not to say I won’t eat a large french fry in it’s place.
JD, sometimes it’s okay to be an enabler though, right? (I have to say that, since I am one). It’s nice that you do for your wife. But yes, one Snicker bar is more than enough… as a matter of fact, it’s too much, lol! No candy for me.
Maria, I read that you were boycotting those products. Good for you!! I wish I could stay away from chocolate, it’s one of my biggest weaknesses. I LOVE chocolate. It’s good to be strong in your convictions, even when chocolate is concerned… I just don’t know that I could ever be so strong. Then again, slave trade is a pretty huge motivator. Then again, so is my weight issue.
I could go for a large fry right now… instead, I’m going to bed. To sleep is to dine, they say.
I need to change my eating habits too – I am usually good during the week then the weekend feast begins! its brutal. Thanks for the encouraging post. I’ll be back.
Sherer, thanks for stopping by and taking the time to leave me a comment. I’m glad I could be encouraging. My eating habits are terrible, but I’m working hard to change that! You’re more than welcome to come back any time, hope to see you soon!
Hey congratulations on taking steps to a better life! I too am in the midst of attempting a lifestyle & dietary change (gosh it’s hard) but I know you’ll get there!! (and so will I) YAY US!
P.S. I really like your pink shiny glittery butterfly thing in your logo. It’s beautiful and it made me feel all warm and fuzzy
SpaceFairy, thanks for stopping by and for the compliments on my header. I like it. I’m fairly fickle about blog design, I change it all the time, but I’ve managed to stick with the butterfly for a while so I have a good feeling about it. Thanks for the congrats, I need all the encouragement I can get, lol. Stop by any time. Also, I really enjoyed your blog!!